May 2013
peanutbuttarunna:
a-fucking-creeper:
mareeps:
they should have made specialty ice cream flavors for the election
mint romney and obamanana split
i’m 500% done with this site
barackyroad
wartortles:
*holding phone in hand* where the fuck is my phone
letlipsdowhathandsdo:
Do you ever just start narrating your life? Like it’s a novel? Sometimes when I’m reading a lot I start to narrate my life, and then I catch myself, and I’m like, whoa. Cuz suddenly I’m thinking in wide vocabulary articulate thoughts that I save for writing. It’s weird. I’m weird.
bedquest:
dear fucking tumblr
this is a fucking bumblebee
this is a fucking bee
this is a fucking hornet
this is a fucking wasp
as you can fucking see the longer their legs are and the less fuzzy they are is equivalent to how fucking evil they fucking are
tardisity:
The oldest person alive was born on April 19, 1897, meaning that April 18th, 1897 was approximately the last time the Earth was inhabited by an entirely different set of people and if you don’t think that’s the realist shit ever then you can get right on outta town.
nikaalexandra:
do you ever hear someone’s name and just
My hobbies include laying in bed in my underwear while I listen to music and hate myself
in 7 years its going to be the 20s again so we can bring back swing music and the aesthetics of that era but keep modern values who’s with me
fakehighschoolboyfriend:
a musical entitled “may, senior year” filled with hits such as:
“i never knew you wanted to join the military”
“why are you getting married”
“that’s an awful tattoo”
“what am i doing for the rest of my life”
“how will i afford deodorant in college”
“why can’t i graduate already”
“why can’t i graduate already (reprise): why am i graduating already”
i ate my twin in the womb
mememaster:
abbysetcetera:
Adulthood doesn’t mean you stop drinking juice pouches and eating fruit snacks. It means buying your own.
That’s deep
iguanamouth:
i think its funny how there are some actors who played a role for so long that its almost impossible for me to see them as anything else
and then there are some actors who’ve done so many roles i dont even see them as actors anymore it’s just them as themselves in another movie
coltheartedbitch:
have you ever just been so incredibly fond of someone
like you don’t want to date them or anything but you honestly love them as a person and want to listen to them talk forever and find out all of their little quirks and hug them when they’re sad
harrysthefather:
my parents literally never gave me the sex talk they just sent me to public school
thereisnothingicantbe:
My dad treats Easter like its the fucking Olympics. He gets this sick enjoyment from watching us trying to find our baskets that literally could be ANYWHERE. Last year mine was suspended in air inside our fireplace. 2 years ago my brother had to scale the side of a tree to get his basket down. THIS ISN’T THE GODDAMN TRIWIZARD TOURNAMENT DAD JUST GIVE ME MY FUCKING PEEPS.
theoncomingstormofgallifrey:
such-a-retardis:
catswithbenefits:
why ride a rollercoaster when you can ride me
Because rollercoasters can actually make me scream.
norsegays:
“tumblr should have its own island!!!!!!!!”
When someone touches your prop or costume
howdoiplacethat:
batfricans:
is there anything worse than hearing your own recorded voice i think no
